here and there

today  realized, maybe there is someone out there, a woman that would fit me so much in every aspect. the only problem is i'm here and she is there out of nowhere maybe i don't even know who is she. even if i know her there is another problem, maybe she would not know who am i, just like i don't know myself.
the main problem is, maybe i have waste my whole life with much useless thing which is making me feel so bad. all of those fucking thing left me with no confidence to do anything.

that is NOT a point! i have to look around. here not somewhere out there. i still have a parent, family, someone special, a good friend, mentor, everything! they supported me, motivating me to do my best! they believe in me, why would i complaint so much? the only thing i have to do is look around, anyway i still have much time to change my life, to do what i supposed to do! to reach everything that i wanted! i'm so young, i'm full of chance, i would not die in vain